Truer Than Fiction

My not-so-eventful, everyday life.

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Location: Gaithersburg, Maryland, United States

Saturday, December 17, 2005

Spend, Spend, Spend

I woke up early this morning so that I could do what Americans do best: go out and spend money. I had several errands I needed to run. First, I went by Best Buy to return the iPod FM transmitter that I bought, because it sucked. It was weak and only had eight stations that you could set it to. I just can't settle for that, so I returned it. I also picked up C's Christmas present.

After that it was to Lakeforest Mall... to spend more money. Courtney wanted me to get a haircut before Christmas, so I decided to do that today before we went to Kim's party. However, this haircut was no ordinary haircut. No, sir. This haircut was a landmark event in the history of me getting my hair cut. Today, ladies and gentlemen, marks the first time (since I was like 8), that the barber had to raise my chair.

I'll pause to let you catch your breath. Don't hyperventillate. Brown paper bags are in the kitchen if you need assistance.

That's right, my barber needed to lift my chair to give me a haircut. I'm a skosh (man I love that word) taller than six feet, so I'd almost forgotten that little pedal beneath the chair was even there. However, my barber today was like six foot five, so he actually needed to raise my chair to cut my hair. What a fun little ride. After my haircut, I got lunch at Chick-fil-a, and then it was time to go to Pep Boys... spend more money.

I noticed on Friday that Courtney's right rear brake light was out, so I took her car over to Pep Boys to buy a replacement. Let me tell you, if you ever need to feel like a man's man, just head on over to Pep Boys. There will be at least four other guys in the parking lot working on their cars. So I went in, bought the replacement tail light, and busted out the toolbox. There's very few things more manly than working on a car. The only things more manly than working on a car are eating a giant steak and shaving with a knife.

Even though I know absolutely nothing about cars and was only replacing a tail light, for about five minutes I felt like a kindred spirit. A car guy, if you will. The sense of belonging wore off quickly when I noticed I'm standing there with my leather jacket and Dockers while these other guys are in their soiled car shop clothes. I'll never be a true car guy, but every once in a while I get to pretend.

On the ride home, it finally dawned on me the kind of place the DC Metro area really is. I was stopped behind an SUV at a red light, and I noticed that he had padlocked his spare tire to the frame of his car. I had never thought of someone stealing spare tires before. It had just never crossed my mind, but apparently it's actually a problem in the DC Metro area. How very sad.

Hmm, I wonder how much money you can get from that...

I'm currently up $4.70 at a $.25/$.50 limit table, it's almost time for Kim's party, and Phil's on his way up. Hit it!*

*With profuse apologies to the Blues Brothers.


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